The envelope, please

Having spent the last seven nights in four different hotels, I'm ready to share a few conclusions about staying in rented beds. While the room rate did not differ by $20, the amenities and extra charges rose exponentially with the "classiness" of the property. Class does not automatically equate with an enjoyable stay.

Used to be you were slumming to stay at a Motel 6 (or one of its ilk) when you were used to say, Hilton. Now Hilton has a whole range of properties and quite frankly, given the choice, I'll hop into a Hampton or Homewood Suites (my fav on this trip) before a full-blown Hilton any day. And why? Oh, free breakfast. Free wifi. Free parking.

Because the class joint we're staying in this time, a Westin to set the record straight, has none of the above. A great room rate, a quiet room, a choice (and expensive--$20 for some movies!) of movies, a wonderful work-out facility. What this class place doesn't have: free breakfast. Wifi in the rooms. (I'm not the only renegade in the lobby where there is free wifi and yes, if wifi were in the rooms, I'd pay for it.) There is free parking if you're willing to go underground into the bowels of the shopping complex next door--or pay $25/day valet. Just put it on the bill.

At one of the Hamptons we stayed at this time out, we had satellite TV. SATELLITE! In HD, even. (No wifi in the rooms however, the first time I've even encountered either experience in a Hampton.) With the satellite, there were no movies to rent. Just as well, as we had a hard enough time figuring out the two remote controls. If we had put choices into the mix, we'd have really been confused.

But I had forgotten to bring along an envelope to put our receipts in. No problem. I'd just scour the desk for one. Really? When was the last time you found stationery or postcards in the room? Nobody writes any more, other than the little pad by the telephone. At least there were pens. A trip to the front desk secured an envelope, but even it wasn't marked with the hotel's address.

Conclusion? Whereas the desk clerk at a cheaper hotel (all things being relative) used to dread to see a guest come in used to the classiness of a top property (what bellman? what valet?--and don't even think about thick towels), now I think the tide has turned. It's the guys at the classy properties who should grimace when I have to slum and stay where the towels are thick, the bellmen plentiful, and the concierge helpful.

Where's my breakfast?